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wander.. i wander.. is it always meant to be like that... i will run..
search.. find.. enjoy... friends eyes.. happiness.. lost.. lost of my
mind actually.. falling down.. grieve.. or even die.. not really, but
just inside of me..
then wake up.. breath again.. and run again..
fly again.. like a squirrel sprinting in the wheel?..
where i run? something inside says me - you run - from your self.. and
things to be done.. real things.. huh you know it doesnt help.. i am
such a fool.. and i keep running.. probably till i hit some wall and
drop without breath.. there.. unable to crawl over it..
So.. while i was obsessed with my learning being like a preserved flower
in the globe of our guilds great book shelves.. it seems the world
continued its spinning around.. or floating? does the Norrath spin? or
its floats in the galaxy? what a question.. so.. i woke up.. and
dragged my self out of the rooms..the fresh air almoust knocked me
down.. i feel like a sick sweating rat with wet eyes atemting to look on
the sun.. i am dazzled by the air.. light..
huh.. Robi?! damn how long.. really we were in the library..
time passed.. i barely recognize the faces of our guildies.. many of
them are totally new.. fresh mmm bloood.. mmm such a smell... oh?!wt..
damn probably i was too long between all those ancient folios.. seems
their.. sometimes dark aura is taken over my mind.. im stated to think
like a necromancer.. not a warden.. happy cheerful druid the friend of
nature.. i am sick haha..
ah that bad feeling here it comes.. Nipik is gone.. i got thise news and
got my self to the Othmirs village as soon as i could.. all what i
could greet.. or greave over.. was his memorial.. and his last message..
hope.. he left me.. i was so sunk in my thoughts and it came from
somewhere in my head.. in the silent..
- hey young one.. you still have your restless heart.. you are still that old Maef i have known so many years.. centuries..
- Nipik?! are you?!
- Lodizal needs your help.. and it is one of your paths you must
take in your life.. the turtle way.. i believe in you. be safe my young
one.
- Nipik?! wait!
and suddenly all the sounds of the village returned back. the fishermen
yelling.. the snoring.. snow squeezing under the paws.. water splashes..
life.. some young othmir was shaking my arm..
-- Maam? are you talking to me? are you all right..
- he.. a..? i am sorry who is the Lodizals speaker now?
-- Osh Maam..
- oh thank you.. young one..
young one... i still remember how that sounded Nipik way.. heh..
Osh was a great guy with big heart i knew him for long time too.. he was
right there in the Nipiks place.. so strange.. beside the great
turtle..
we talked a lot.. about trust.. and friendship.. about last days of Nipik.. about Lodizal.. about bad and good things..
about my way.. my way of the turtle.. i dont remember.. but i ve fallen a sleep.. tired.. and got another dream..
i was lost.. in the water.. there was cold.. tunnels.. stinky sticky air around me.. and feeling.. again..
another mystery..but not like before.. its was a nightmare.. pure evil
pulsating around.. and i was sinking.. afraid.. while those holes were
looking at me coldly.. like all my life was meant to be like that.. to
over like that..
and there i was.. my way of the turtle had finished.. hah and Nipik..
what i will say to him.. so cold.. my heart is freezing.. my veins is
emptying.. im falling down.. down in the dark..
- young one! wake up! you can! thats your way and you still can chose
your path.. dont believe your eyes your ears! the dark tries to cloud
your mind with fear and disbelieve! wake up!